Please, let me fuck your mom
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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