can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
