No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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