so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
