just tell him i said nine months
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
