I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
