Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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