I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
