At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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