We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize