im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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