Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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