It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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