plz talk dirty to me
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
