Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
