PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Randomize
