that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize