I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize