do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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