We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
