maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Randomize
