WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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