Don't you send me to vm
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
