Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
His nipple licking is glorious
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