where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Randomize
