Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
