This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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