my mouth tastes like poor choices
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
