I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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