i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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