what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
