I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
