Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
