She's JV to your varsity
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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