roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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