I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
