I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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