I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
