using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
