You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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