Whoa Z and x make the same sound
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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