So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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