If i come over, it means nothing
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
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In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
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Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I pour the whiskey from now on
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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