i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
