I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
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