i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize