So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.