My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
