If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.