Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready