i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He shit in the fireplace
The adults are the big ones right?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
