I bet he comes in French.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...